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How to Endure Unrequited Love

Lena Kirakosyan's picture
Unrequited Love

How to endure loving someone who doesn't love you and how to get over it. What happens when you experience unrequited love.


Once I read that in adolescence, a person must experience unrequited love. This completes the formation of his psyche. This shows that you do not control the soul of another person and can not influence his choice in any way.

But this experience of frustration is much more painful. The trouble is that no one promised us happiness. You have to understand that you can be loved the way you are, that you do not have to stand on tiptoe, jump, perform feats, and saddle dragons to achieve love.

We are all imperfect, everyone has flaws - and then suddenly there is someone who perfects you. However, maybe he does not want all that. Or she. But this is also a stage of growing up. It’s difficult to survive. You will cry a lot.

It's hard to believe that, looking back - ten, twenty, thirty, forty years later - you’ll think: Lord, what kind of fool I was!

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It's terribly difficult, but you have to grow into adulthood, where you can walk through life yourself, without relying on another person.

This is also a stage of growing up: learning to be self-sufficient. Learn not to shift the responsibility of being happy with who you are onto others. Don’t tell others that you can’t live without them. Learn to exist by yourself. Accept your value, your dignity. Rebuild your relationship with life. Learn to trust and laugh.

It's hard to say what's worse - honest, clear grief, when life suddenly loses meaning, or hidden, disenfranchised grief, when for years you cannot tell anyone what is going on.
Nobody promised us happiness. Pushkin understood this the best: there is no happiness in the world, but there is peace and will. This is also a lot. And Pushkin knew best what to do with unrequited love: do not howl at it, but let it go peacefully and gratefully.

This is terribly painful, yes.

To love the person who left is to keep a positive memory of something that ended. It is important to endure many things while you live. Also, see this article in which the Russian Patriarch says that the ideal of a young life should be starting a family.

Reference: Pravmir