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Orgasms may enhance quality communication between couples

Harold Mandel's picture
Man and woman

People naturally have a keen interest in human sexuality. After all this is part of what makes us human beings. The association of orgasms and alcohol generally evokes negative images of sexual abuse and depression. However, there is an upside to a consideration of what orgasms may have to offer if you are in a good relationship. New research shows that orgasms may facilitate quality communication.

Orgasm facilitates good feelings about making disclosures

Researchers have studied the influence of orgasms and alcohol on communication after sexual activity reported Communication Monographs. This study explored postcoital disclosures by investigating the role which orgasms and alcohol have on communication after sexual activity over a two-week period of time. It was revealed in the results that people who had an orgasm perceived of greater benefits to making disclosures to their partners after sexual activity.

Alcohol lessens good feelings about making disclosures

Information with more positive valence and importance was shared after an orgasm in comparison to individuals who did not experience an orgasm. Excessive alcohol consumption was associated with an assessment of fewer benefits to making disclosures. Disclosures under the influence of alcohol were also not as deep and less positively valenced. In individuals who consumed more alcohol and did not experience orgasm there was a disclosure of less positively valenced information than individuals who consumed less alcohol and did not experience orgasm.

What has been discovered therefore is that not only are orgasms good for your sexual relationship, they also promote good communication reports the National Communication Association via Newswise. In the aftermath of experiencing an orgasm people are more likely to share important information with their sexual partners. Furthermore, the nature of that communication is likely to be positive.

Post-coital communication is likely associated with sexual and relationship satisfaction

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Amanda Denes, Assistant Professor at the University of Connecticut, and lead author of the study, says post-coital communication is likely associated with sexual and relationship satisfaction. What Denes refers to as pillow talk may therefore play an important role in maintaining intimacy.

Oxytocin pours into a person’s brain immediately after an orgasm

A pro-social hormone known as oxytocin pours into a person’s brain immediately after an orgasm. There is a greater sense of trust and lowered perceptions of threat associated with elevated levels of oxytocin. There are also decreased levels of the stress hormone cortisol at this time. This combination appears to facilitate an environment in which people feel safe disclosing information to their sexual partner.

Contrary to what is commonly believed mixing alcohol with sex is not likely to lead individuals to divulge more of their significant secrets. Although immediately after sex people who have been drinking are likely to say things to their partner that they hadn’t planned to disclose, their pillow talk has been found to consist of less important information and is not as positive as that of people who drink less on average.

Oxytocin is an upper and alcohol is a downer

Tamara Afifi, a professor at the University of Iowa, and co-author of the study says that oxytocin is an upper and alcohol is a downer. It is therefore not surprising that they have opposite effects on a person's behavior. The more alcohol which is consumed by people the fewer benefits they perceive
to disclosing information to their partners.

When alcohol is combined with failing to experience an orgasm there is even more negativity. However, it is suggested by this study that orgasm may counteract the negative effects of alcohol
consumption on communication after sexual activity. But, people who regularly drink greater amounts of alcohol before having sex may have developed communication patterns which undermine positive post-sex communication.

Sexual relations are generally a sensitive and important issue to people. The finding that orgasm can improve a relationship not just by promoting good feelings but also by enhancing the quality of communication after sex is interesting. It should however be kept in mind that drinking alcohol can ruin all of this.