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I Am Jealous of My Friend Who Wants a Job Where I Work, but I Feel Terrible

Armen Hareyan's picture
His friend wants a job where he works

He got a job with fixed term contract and told his friend. His friend also wants a job where he works and she applied for a position in the same company. She is now being interviewed for the permanent position and he is jealous. He knows it's bad.


Jealousy is one of the seven deadly sins and many people are plagued with this passion. Most people will probably say no if you ask them if they are jealous of something. But they don't realize jealousy can plague us in casual life situations without us knowing about it specifically.

Today I learned about a man who is worried because his friend, with whom he gets along very well may get a permanent job in his workplace.

His Friend Wants A Job Where He Works

He recently got a new job and is at at the moment fixed term with the possibility of it becoming permanent. He says he loves his job and the people are really nice there. He hopes to stay there permanently.

But then he spoke to a friend and she got very excited about this company. He thought she wanted to stay in her own company and grow there, but when a job came up in his company she wanted to apply for it. She did end up applying for a position in his company and now being interviewed for a permanent position.

He Is Worried, Jealous and Feels Terrible

I did some searching online and found that worrying when a friend gets a job in your company is a common issue. Especially when you get a fixed term contract and all of the sudden your friend gets a permanent position straight away. People's fears that they are worried that one day they will have to leave the company and their friends will stay. The interesting thing is, many of these people know this is jealousy, but they are anxious and don't' know how to handle it.

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Some of them write that they feel terrible. Other's say they feel guilty because they are unable to rejoice in their friend's success. What to do?

The Bad, The God, and a Solution

The worst thing here is jealousy. The best thing is his ability to see it and he acknowledges that he feels jealous and feels terrible. He says he feels like a horrible person. This is the starting point for healing. When you see that something in your feelings is not right you can do something about. But if you don't see that evil in you, you won't be able to do anything about it. In fact, you will suffer more because you don't know where you enemy comes from or how it strikes you.

The advice is rejoicing. Be happy for your friend. You wrote that you get on really well. The goal of any job is not personal advancement, but the good things one brings to the workplace and the value created for the public

"If you share secretly in the joy of someone you envy, you will be freed from your jealousy; and you will also be freed from your jealousy if you keep silent about the person you envy," writes St Thalassios the Libyan. Don't let jealousy bother you.

Instead, think of it this way: "I am very happy that my friend is going to work in the same company with me. Together we will create more value for people and make this world a better place. I am glad for the expertise she will bring in to our company. The company, instead of hiring someone else, now will hire my friend, whom I know and with whom I get really well. I love my friend and I love the people in my company. We are going to work together as a great team, helping one another and caring for one another."

Also see: I need to forgive, but I don't know how to forgive and move on in a relationship.

I am not a licensed counselor, but I will be happy to listen and provide practical Christian answers if you struggling with a family issue and would like to talk one on one. I can be contacted here.

If you have been in a similar situation where you didn't want your friend to work in your company or actually helped a friend to work in your company, please, let us know in the comments section below. How did you handle those situations and how they turned out?



Hi Armen. I've noticed you've used my post from a mental health forum as reference for your article. I don't mind but would you mind making it a bit more anonymised as at one point you have quoted WORD for WORD what I have posted. It would also have been nice if you'd have asked before you quoted me. Changing my gender hasn't anonymised me. But I like the advice. Thanks
Hi Alice, Thank you for your feedback. True that I learned about this story in one of the mental health forums. I tried to anonymize as much as possible and it was already kind of anonymized int he forum as well. The only reason I quoted from the post is that it was a public forum and the information is publicly available for anyone on the internet. And I didn't provide a direct reference trying to give it more anonymity. Please, let me know if you would like me to change more things in this story. But I am glad that you liked the advice. Truly, I am glad that it was helpful. Maybe it will help many other people who are in similar situations. I hope things are better now. Feel free to write me directly through our contact information if you may have questions. Have a blessed day.