Ten Steps to Improved Self-Esteem

It's not vain to think well of yourself - it's called confidence. And let's face it, confident people are more attractive. There's an aura around a person with confidence that suggests glowing colors and bright sunshine on the rainiest day. Who wouldn't rather spend time with a relaxed and happy person than with that tense person glowering in the corner? People with high self-esteem look happier, healthier and more vibrant.

Gaining self-esteem is not as hard as you think, so why not start doing something about it right now. All steps, big and small, towards gaining self-esteem fall into two main categories: A) Avoid the negative and B) Accentuate the positive. Need more details? Just follow these 10 steps, and you'll find yourself feeling better about who you are in no time.

Avoid The Negative:

Tell the critical voices of those friends and family shouting in your head to shut up. Actually, say "Stop." and replace the critical thought with a kind, positive thought. Don't let those critics be your mirror. Those 'friends' can be like fun-house mirrors given the chance. Before you know it, you're too tall, too short, too fat or too thin - depending on which voice is loudest. Nip those inner voices in the bud - don't let anyone, including yourself, put you down. Cross the street if necessary to avoid people who are disparaging, faultfinding and doubting and you won't have to expend all that energy trying to dislodge negative words. After all, if you clog your ears with useless nonsense, how are you going to hear the compliments? Listening to only the negative is deliberately putting yourself into a nightmare. Wake up already.

Don't compare yourself to others. Why depress yourself by using a friend, acquaintance or movie star as a measuring stick that leaves you short? You don't have to beat yourself up because you're not as rich, famous or thin as what's her name. That's a recipe that can leave the most envied person in the world feeling totally miserable. Trust me, anyone -no matter how seemingly perfect - who is focused on how much more fabulous someone else must be, will not be happy. So try something different - look for ways to use the people you admire as your inspiration to help you towards your own goals. What habits does this person have that could work for you and help your own personality to shine? Emulate an exercise regimen, a work ethic or just smile more often.

Start saying no. Chances are "no" was one of the first words you ever said. At one time, it may even have been your favorite. USE IT. Don't say yes to things you don't want to do - especially when you feel you're being taken advantage of.